I have to admit that I live in a pretty sheltered little bubble at times. We have very few friends who are divorced. We have recently had houseguests that are in the process of divorcing. Yes, they were here at the same time because they are from another country and were here to bring their children to the US on holiday. They are much more amicable than I would guess any divorcing parents are...but then it's a problem I am unfamiliar with. I'd like to think that I would be kind and put the children first, but then I do have a bit of a temper and at time a tongue that is loosed... but I digress.
I really enjoyed getting to see my friends and their children. I am happy to say that even though I met the 'him' part of the couple first, the friendship with the 'her' part of the couple is not going to be lost just because of the divorce. My husband gets along well with both of them, as do I, but I just don't speak geek as fluently as my husband does! ha. The two guys and I all worked together for a computer company more years ago that I'd like to admit. However, my life has changed and I now stay at home with my two DSs. I have to say that the conversations about system requirements, changing specifications, and end-users that are resistant to change just aren't my cup of tea any longer. I can tune in and empathize, but my hubby is much better at those conversations than I am!
The upshot of the weekend when we were all together is that I have realized (again) what a wonderful man God provided for me as a husband and father. He is attentive to our sons. He listens to me. My friend no longer has that in a marital relationship. They are in separate houses, with separate lives, and as such, no longer have the other to provide companionship and support. I know this probably sounds weird to anyone but me....but seeing how they are no longer together, makes me realize the blessings I have in my marriage.
I guess that's something that we all do at times: view our own lives differently after seeing the dramatic changes in the lives of those around us.
I don't know why I'm surprised by this, after the summer my family has had, but I am.
Watching my mom stick by my dad after ALL that he has been through is a testament to what wedding vows are about -- for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health.
Seeing my friends who tried to very hard to make it work, yet their ending is different from my parents' ending....it just makes me want to appreciate what I have that much more. I hope neither of my friends read this and think that I am being judgemental -- I'm not -- I'm just sad that things worked out the way they did. I am truly ignorant of the range of emotions that come into play when a marriage breaks down, but I hope that I am still a good friend to both, regardless of their marital status.
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